Secrets of parenting : building a great relationship with your teen

Distributed in furtherance of the acts of Congress of May 8 and June 30, 1914. North Carolina State Uni¬ versity and North Carolina A&T State University com¬ mit themselves to positive action to secure equal opportunity regardless of race, color, creed, national origin, religion, sex, age, or disability. In addition, the two Universities welcome all persons without regard to sexual orientation. North Carolina State University, North Carolina A&T State University, U.S, Department of Agriculture, and local governments cooperating. NC Building a Great Relationship with Your Teen “You don't understand me at all!'' “You treat me like I'm still a kid!" “You never let me have any fun!" Teenagers are complicated and interesting. While they may be sweet, funny, and help¬ ful one minute, they can often be grumpy and rebellious the next. Teens are constantly changing because they are facing many importanf tasks at this important stage of life. They are becoming more independent, developing important peer relationships, and trying to get used to their changing bodies. “Why does it matter to you?” What Can You Do to Help Your Teen? Has your teenaged son or daughter ever said these things to you? Does it seem as though you're always arguing with your teen? How does it make you feel? How does it make your teen feel? Parenting teenagers can be hard work. Teens today face many difficult issues. And they often have to make serious decisions (like whether to use drugs or have sex] at a very young age. The secret of parenting is to help your teen make good decisions by building a close relationship with him or her. STATE UNIVERSITY A&T STATE UNIVERSITY COOPERATIVE EXTENSION Helping People Put Knowledge to Work Build a strong relationship. Teens who feel close to their parents are more likely to come to them for advice when faced with tough deci¬ sions. They are also more likely to follow their parents’ advice. Teens who feel close to their parents often have higher self-esteem and are better able to stand up to negative peer pressure. Show your love. You can show your love in ways that are comfortable for both of you. Be affectionate. If your teenager is comfortable with warm affection, hug and kiss him... tell him you love him. If your teenager is shy about express¬ ing affection, respect his need for some distance and find other ways to show that you care. Take an interest in what your teenager is do¬ ing and who her friends are. Be there for your teen. Go to her athletic events and science fairs. You can even exchange e-mail with your teenag¬ er to show your interest in her activities. E-mail may feel like a safe way for teens to talk through tough issues with you. Show your support in your teenager’s suc¬ cesses and failures. Let him know you love him no matter what. Being there lets him know you