Coming together : ideas for successful family meetings

Coming Together: Ideas for Successful Family Meetings Distributed in turtherance ot the acts ot Congress ot May 8 and June 30, 1914. North Carolina State University and North Carolina A&T State Uni¬ versity commit themselves to positive action to secure equal opportunity regard¬ less ot race, color, creed, national origin, religion, sex, age, veteran status or disability. In addition, the two Universities welcome all persons without regard to sexual orientation. North Carolina State University, North Carolina A&T State University, U.S. Department ot Agriculture, and local governments cooperating. Most people want a healthy and united family. But how does a parent go about making a family strong? Research points to the importance of communication and commitment within the family. One of the best ways to foster open communication and commitment is by making time for family meetings. What are family meetings? Family meetings are time set aside to promote healthy communication, make decisions, solve problems, and encourage strong family relationships. There are two basic types of family meetings: scheduled and informal. What is the purpose of a scheduled family meeting? A scheduled meeting provides an opportunity to get together and discuss family issues in a clear and organized manner. These meetings are sometimes called family councils, because the whole family comes together to talk about an issue that affects every member: Who’s going to do what chore? What should we do during vacation this summer? How are we going to help Grandpa, now that he needs our support? The entire family works together to answer such questions. Family meetings should include an open dialogue, allowing everyone to express his or her opinions and respond sensitively to one another. Interrupting, criticizing, and correcting should not be allowed. Openly discussing an issue together shows that everyone’s opinion is valued and that the family is a team. To be successful, organized meetings should be short and well planned. Share responsibility for planning and conducting the family meeting. Find ways that even young children can help. You may want to develop a simple written agenda or chart describing what will be covered at the meeting. Parts of this agenda might include the weekly calendar, future plans, family issues or problems, or refreshments. Keep track of the decisions made, and post the decisions as reminders. A scheduled family meeting can also be an ideal place to deal with problems as they arise. Parents should not point fingers, but instead invite the entire family to brainstorm. When children are involved in the solution process, they are much more likely to comply with decisions. Rather than mandating or dictating what is to be done, parents should have some idea of a desired outcome and primarily listen and help guide their children toward an acceptable solution. State University A&T State University COOPERATIVE EXTENSION Empowering People • Providing Solutions